Issues

Dear Friends and Followers:

I keep getting fired from my jobs working in political campaigns. I don’t know why. I’m just a poor Alien trying to make a living. Big Dope just says, “Stuff happens.”

But I do try to keep up. From my readings, I sense that the 2016 campaign has started in sincere and intense conviction. (Editor’s note: He means “in earnest.”)It looks like a repeat of some of the same themes from previous campaigns, as Big Dope calls them:

God-Guns-Gays

Benghazi-Benghazi-Benghazi

Iran-Iraq-Invade

Birth-Bubba-Bitch

Taxes-Terrorists-Teachers

If I were advising one of the parties, I would suggest focusing on what my research and study suggests are some genuine issues facing your country, or at least many of the communities. I would list

Drugs-Disinvestment-Despair

And by drugs, I’m not talking about what you call your “war.” Hard as I try, I fail to explain to the Falloonian Elders the concept of a war on a word. No, I’m talking about the fact that so many of your species exhibit what we all ewnnoheetudat, or what you call “addiction.” The Elders cannot comprehend why you spend your resources on making war on the transporters of addictive agents instead of medically treating the condition as they do on other planets in our galaxy.  You do this in a limited fashion with those addicted to gambling instead of drugs.

Anyway, I would love to report to the Falloonian Elders that at least one of your political parties seems willing to address genuine issues.

Oh wait. Big Dope just walked by and read this. Never mind.

Now he’ll probably want to steal it and post it somewhere.

Yesterday's Sunday post follows.

 

See also: www.wattensawpress.com