“Man, we’ve got to get into this
religion racket.”
“Some of my friends wouldn’t call
it a racket,” I said.
“What would you call it?” C.W.
was all turned out in expensive clothes (Heaven knows where he got them), a
fake platinum watch, and a haircut that looked like three plates of spaghetti piled
on top of one another.
“Some call it a pursuit of
spirituality,” I said, “a search for grace.”
“Oh, that’s them old-timey folks,”
he said. “I’m talking about modern times. I tell, you, there’s gold in those
pews.”
“How so?”
He closed his eyes as if praying
for understanding. “Don’t you read the news?”
“I quit … too depressing.”
“Well,” he said, “the evangelism stars
are aligning themselves.”
“Uh,” I said, “I think you are
mixing metaphors or something like that.”
“Whatever,” he said. “The time is
right.”
“The time is right for what?”
“My new religion.”
“I see. You are going to start a
new religion.”
“Yes. And I need some rent money
for a tabernacle.”
“I’m not sure there are many
tabernacles for rent around here.”
“Oh, a simple coliseum will do
for now.”
“And this new church will be
called what?”
“The Church of the Corporate
Covenant.”
“The what?”
“You heard me.” He said. “It’s a
church for corporation people only we will allow other types of people as well.”
“And whose idea was this?”
“I got it from your Superior To
All Others Court.”
“Our Supreme Court?”
“Why do you repeat me so often?”
“A habit, I suppose. But how is
our Supreme Court going to help you start a church?”
“Not help, enable.”
“How so?”
“Haven’t you heard? Corporations
have human feelings like everyone else, including religious feelings.”
“And?”
“Laws must respect those and make
allowances.”
“So?”
“What corporation wants to pay
taxes?”
“Uh …”
“What corporation wants to allow
a woman to run it?”
“Well …”
“What corporation in American
wants to pay higher wages than does a corporation in Sri Lanka?”
“Ah …”
“And black folks, give me a
break. They steal more than they produce. Ask Bill O’Reilly If we didn’t have
to hire them, corporate profits would soar.”
“Corporate profits are already
soaring.”
“But just wait,” he said, “until
we don’t have to hire cripples anymore.”
“C.W., I can’t believe I hear you
saying these things.”
“I’m merely speaking for the Lord
of Corporations. I’m a way-pointer on the path to salvation.”
I was beginning to understand. “So
you will set up a church that objects to all these restrictions on religious
grounds.”
 |
| Isn't it thrilling? your new Civil Rights movement. - C.W. |
“In exact terms, without
vagueness.”
“And exactly why do you think it
will work?”
“Because you are a Level Nineteen
Species.”
“A level what?”
“A species that has been walking upright
for less than half a million years. It’s a Galactic Council term. It indicates
provisionality.”
“And?”
“You may not have long so let’s
get busy.”
Click on an ad. We need money for our adventures.
And check our www.wattensawpress.com
- C.W.
