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Thursday, November 26, 2015

Ask The Alien: Revenge

Dear Ask the Alien:
During Happy Hour the other evening, my wife revealed to me that there were some events in her life that she had never shared with me. This bothers me quite a bit for we have been married for what seems like a thousand years. And ... it makes me more convinced than ever that she threw away my "Slim Whitman" album years ago and it wasn't really the only item taken during a burglary like she claimed.
My question is this. Should I retaliate? She has a ZZ Top CD that she is extremely fond of.
Signed,
Vengeful

Dear Vengeful:
No, I kinda like her ZZ ... uh ... oh ... I mean from the way you put it, she is a person of great patience and ability to plan long-term. If you ever intend to sleep all night again, I would counsel restraint. Of course you could buy a Jennifer Hudson CD and begin playing it at top volume, but I doubt if any jury would convict someone of murder as a means of avoiding such screeching. Best learn to appreciate "Gimme All Your Lovin'"
Yours,
The Alien C.W.

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